1. Virginity is the best wedding gift any man would receive from his newly wedded wife, but lately, there’s nothing like that any longer because it’ll have already been given out as a birthday gift, token of appreciation, job assurance, church collection, examination marking schemes and for taxi fare!
2. Treat every part of your towel nicely because the part that wipes your buttocks today will wipe your face tomorrow.
3. We are living in a generation where people “in love” are free to touch each others’ private parts but cannot touch each others’ phones because they’re private”.
4. Sometimes you look back at girls you spent money on rather than having it spent on your mum…then you realise witchcraft is real.
5. If you are a married man, and you find yourself attracted to school girls, just buy your wife a school uniform.”
6.If President Barack Obama wants me to allow marriage for same-sex couples in my country (Zimbabwe), he must first come here so that I can marry him.
7. South Africans will kick down a statue of a dead white man but won’t even attempt to slap a live one. Yet they can stone to death a black man simply because he’s a foreigner.
8. Cigarette is a pinch of tobacco rolled in a piece of paper with fire on one end and a fool on the other end.
Source: Zimbabwe Today