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Man Tries Making Tea Using Wi-fi Kettle – it takes a Little Longer than Expected, What Happened will Surprise You

A watched pot quite literally never boils – and it’s every tea-lovers worst nightmare

Technology , eh? It’s meant to make life so simple.

However, while most of us can cope when it misbehaves slightly – dodgy signal, unexpected items in the bagging area etc – when it proves to be an obstacle for making a cup of tea , well, that’s a different story.

The humble cup of tea is basically a magical elixir to many of us and that’s all Mark Rittman wanted. A simple cup of tea.

It should have been as straightforward as popping a tea bag in the cup, checking if there’s milk in the fridge, flipping a switch on and waiting for a couple minutes.

This, alas, was not how it was for Mark.

If you love to tea in an almost unhealthy way or are the sort of person who cannot bear to wait for anything, then brace yourselves.

At 9am, Mark, a data specialist who lives in Hove, turned on his wi-fi enabled kettle, the Guardian writes.

Three hours later, he was still waiting

View image on Twitter


Mark Rittman @markrittman

3 hrs later and still no tea. Mandatory recalibration caused wifi base-station reset, now port-scanning network to find where kettle is now.



Admittedly, we only understand a third of that tweet but we get the most important point. Mark has waited three hours for a cup of tea.

Hard to say whether we would have given up and gone to a coffee shop or lobbed the offending kettle out of the window.

You might be thinking, “surely the kettle’s wi-fi will kick in soon?”

Wrong. The kettle clearly had other plans for Mark and his day. Also, by this point Twitter were getting involved as per usual, which was probably more of hindrance than a help.

View image on Twitter

View image on Twitter


Mark Rittman @markrittman

Now the Hadoop cluster in garage is going nuts due to RT to@internetofshit, saturating network + blocking MQTT integration with Amazon Echo



Again, much of Mark’s second tweet went over our heads. Hadoop cluster what?

This went on for the rest of the working day. The root of the problem was Mark’s kettle didn’t come with the sort of software which would allow it to integrate with other devices in his homes.

Mark had to therefore try to build the integration functionality himself.

Yes, that is a blackout he subsequently had to deal with.

Then finally


Written by Bello Olusayo

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